| |
| |
|
Relationships, All the info you need! |
|
|
|
Before Falling Truly and Madly in Love Ask Each Other 10 Pertinent Questions
Falling in love?aaahh what a wonderful experience the first flushes of love are. The heart starts pounding, our temperature rises, and the butterflies begin fluttering whenever the girl/boy of our dreams enters the room. The world looks so?well?rosy. Not only that, life suddenly becomes much more exciting. From my own experiences the heady excitement of first love really did my head in - for some reason commonsense flew out the window?well in the short term anyway. I started accepting things that I normally wouldn't, pulled away from my old friends, and started to lose a part of myself to accommodate the other person. I followed my heart when on reflection I could've saved myself quite a bit of stress had I known a few more things about sharing my life with someone. I never really asked the important questions such as who would be the major breadwinner, compared our values or really planned for the future. I simply followed my heart and went with the flow in blissful abandonment. What do you really know about your future life long mate? Do you know what their favourite piece of music, colour, outfit, book, holiday destination is? What about their likes and dislikes? Do you know what their level of patience and understanding is, are they aware of yours? Are they flexible or inflexible thinkers and do you recognise whether you are or not? I've listed 10 basic points to ask each other before you reach love's point of no return. You could treat this as a date, and also as an opportunity to really get to know each other on a deeper level. Above all be tactfully truthful, treat what the other has to say with respect, and never assume the other knows what you're thinking. If this sounds a bit clinical, consider it as a blueprint of your future lives together. Ever heard the comments "I wish I'd known what I was getting myself into." Or "I wish I knew then, what I know now." Or "I just can't understand her/him." Here are the points: 1. Ask each other what your values are on a scale of 1 - 10. 2. Ask what you really do not value on scale of 1 - 10. 3. Do you both want children? If only one wants children, is there an alternative and is this issue negotiable? 4. Who will be the breadwinner after the baby is born? It's not necessarily dad anymore. Are you both okay with who will be the major breadwinner? 5. Assuming you both were employed prior to children, ask yourselves once you become a parent how long will it be before you return to paid employment. I make this point because from experience that whilst the majority of couples I've met are ok with the traditional scenario of the wife remaining at home with the children, some men have resented this. 6. What do you expect from each other - in sickness and in health? Ask each other what you expect from them; in return let your partner know what you will personally bring into the relationship and what you will continue to bring to the relationship. 7. What will you forgive/not forgive of each other's behaviours, for example, infidelity or lying? 8. Do you have a hobby you could both share? List all the really wonderful things you could do together. 9. Will there be occasions when you want to do things alone? For example, boys/girls night outs, fishing trip with the boys/girls etc. Is this acceptable to you? 10. Is there anything that annoys you about your partner already? Are you willing to accept annoyances? Secretly thinking that your partner will come around to your way of thinking sooner or later could possibly be setting yourself up for disappointment. There's also the risk of blame and anger if you're unable to change something you assumed you could. Accept that nothing in life is perfect - life could be said to be is perfectly imperfect. ©Michaela Scherr Michaela is a Transformational Coach, certified practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP), writer and Metaphysician who is totally committed to helping others create positive and action oriented changes to their lives. Michaela is the author of the e-Book 10 Colour Meditation Scripts (http://www.michaelascherr.com/publications.htm), and publisher of a monthly newsletter called From My Desk. Married to David, Michaela has two children, Kristen and Aaron, and a grandchild called Matthew. Michaela and her family currently live in Brisbane Australia.
MORE RESOURCES:
Benefit From Being Part Of "America'S Most Trusted Company For ... - Franchising.com (press release)
Debt-Relief - Google News |
|
|
|
RELATED ARTICLES
Happily Single v Happily Married Have you noticed how so many people spend their lives wishing they were something they are not?Short people would like to be tall; plump people want to be thin; singles want to be in a relationship, possibly married, and those who are married eye their single friends and the freedom they have, with some jealousy.Family gatherings are always a minefield for the singletons amongst us. Relationhip Advice: 10 Magic Words Just about every night at our house, we read a book called "Say The Magic Words Please" to our young son. The story has lots of magic words, such as "please," "thank you" and "excuse me. Hey There, Whats Your Money Personality? Guys who come up to women in bars and ask: "hey baby, what's your sign?" Since statistics reveal that couples fight over money more than any other issue, maybe a better question to start off a potential relationship is to first find out the other person's money personality.I just learned about money personality typing in a recent workshop and it is quite fascinating. Rediscovering Love and Intimacy Wendy started counseling with me because Terence, her husband of 14 years, had just expressed to her that he wanted to end their relationship. Wendy, terrified of being alone, was panicked. Relationship Advice for Women - Beyond the Happy Ending - Part 2 The Not-the-Same Syndrome How often do we complain that our man isn't romantic enough or he doesn't treat you like he did when you first started dating? Come on, admit it, we do this a lot. The way I see it, there are two sides to this. 10 Reasons Why Married Couples Grow Apart (Part I) When asked why their marriage is on the rocks, many couples often state that they have just grown apart. The reality of that statement just means the individuals no longer relate to or appreciate each other as they once did. Romantic Relationships: An Internal Process If you grew up in the 80s like I did, you might remember the group Depeche Mode and their hit "Just Can't Get Enough." It is a song about being obsessed with the idea of being with someone, about needing another person. Creative Visualizations for Love To manifest love through creative visualization, you first need to learn how to suspend or hold an image of the desired outcome in your mind in as much detail as possible.For instance, let's say that you need to resolve an argument with a dear friend. Soul Mate Myths But the cold truth is that most people have never known the inner radiance of their own soul. Instead, they cling to the many myths about the soul mate relationship that are simply not true. How to Find Relationship Advice One thing to keep in mind when seeking relationship advice is that the relationship advice business is exactly that - a business, and a big business at that. It is important to be aware that there is a lot of bad advice available in the marketplace, a lot of poorly trained relationship counselors around, and a lot of poorly conceived and badly written books on the subject. Denial Is Not A River In Egypt Original it ain't, but it still merits repetition: "Denial is not a river in Egypt". What it is, is a highly addictive behaviour. Soul Mate - a Pain in the Neck "and they lived happily ever after.. How to Choose Your Life Partner? You have reached the age where you can start thinking seriously on your wedding day. You would like a steady partner, whom which you could spend the rest of your life with. If He Insists That You Work... Once, when asked about her life, former First Lady Barbara Bush said, "I married well."Is it wrong to want to marry well? Ladies, it's all about survival - and it's all about what you will be able to do for your children. Gay and Lesbian Relationships America has a reluctance to accept relationships between people of the same gender. This reluctance follows a similar pattern to the hostility towards interracial relationships. Name That Tune Direct Answers - Column for the week of July 26, 2004I have been married to a wonderfully grounded woman for nine years, and we have two young children. The problem? My mother-in-law lives from crisis to crisis. Affairs: Advice for the Couple Recovering from an affair is hard work and will take time.The good news is that in the more than 20 years I've been helping people put a marriage back together after an affair, I have never seen a couple where both partners really wanted to heal their marriage who could not. Are You Relationship Ready? So, you want to fall in love? You are certainly old enough and moving well along your chosen career path. Many of your friends are either married or in committed relationships. Catch a Cheating Lover? Relationships. Virtually all of us are in one, or at some stage, have been. Why He Left Me After...? The next morning he /or she is gone. And because this is a man's privilege, I'll try to give some answers to the women.
|
| home | site map |
| © 2007 RichiesList.com |
