| |
| |
|
Relationships, All the info you need! |
|
|
|
Great Relationship Advice: How to Get "All A's" in Couples Communication
Mark Twain once said that he believed it was "God's great cosmic joke on humanity when He required men and women to live together in marriage." When it comes to couples trying to communicate with each other, I believe old Mr. Clements was right on target. Every day in my office, I watch men and women trying to talk with each other. While from my chair I can understand what each person is trying to say, often times the couple will look like "2 ships passing in the night" in their attempts to understand each other. And then I go home and do the same thing in my own little at-home laboratory. So let's look at how to go from flunking to getting all A's in couples communication. The four courses (or A's) are: Assumption-Asking-Assimilation-Action. Assumption We have all heard the saying that to assume means to make an "ass out of u and me." Did you also know that "assumption is the lowest form of knowledge?" And still we do it every day with our partners. It happens in at least two ways: 1."Since I know what I like and need, I'll give the same thing to my partner" . "If my partner really loved me, they would 'just know' what I want and need" It's one of the main ways we flunk couple communication. Asking Let's blow a popular couples myth out of the water right now. You know, the one that goes "it doesn't count if I have to ask." If that's true, then just how are we going to find out? I work with the minds of people all day long, but I still can't read them. Instead, I just ask lots of questions. Here's a few that I recommend to discover how your partner sees and experiences the world: "here's what I think you mean. Do I have it right?" "in order to feel the most loved, do you need to see it, feel it, or hear it?" "what does love look like to you" "what do you think is romantic?" If you don't know, ask. You have to A-S-K to G-E-T. Assimilation For our purposes, assimilation means to take the information you asked for and received and make it a part of your "working knowledge" of your partner. Using a computer metaphor, you need to install the information you have learned in your own brain. Many folks get in trouble when they ask their partner for information, forget to install it, and then have to ask again and again. Whether intended or not, this sends the message that you were not really listening or interested, and/or that you don't really care. Yet another popular method of flunking couples communication. Action! I realize this may sound too simple, but once you install this stuff you have got to use it. Knowing what to do and doing it are not the same, they are very different. Understanding is a good thing. We all like to be understood. But if it stops there, it stops too short of what's needed. To get an A in this last part of couples communication, you have to put your understanding into action, what I call putting "hands and feet" on what you know. Visit SecretsofGreatRelationships.com for tips and tools for creating and growing a great relationship. You can also subscribe to our f*r*e*e 10 day e-program on how to enrich your relationship today, from relationship coach and expert Jeff Herring.
MORE RESOURCES:
Debt-Relief - Google News |
|
|
|
RELATED ARTICLES
Creative Visualizations for Love To manifest love through creative visualization, you first need to learn how to suspend or hold an image of the desired outcome in your mind in as much detail as possible.For instance, let's say that you need to resolve an argument with a dear friend. Relationship Advice: How to Ignore Your Spouse or Partner Marriage can be one of the quickest and most effective paths to taking someone special for granted.We don't mean to do it. How We Define Our Relationships? We can fall into the habit of complaining about our relationships, but do we really take the time to evaluate them? Maybe not, because well, we're always right! He or she never listens to ME or does things the way I think is right (the human EGO speaking loudly here!).First of all, we need to understand one thing - which we do not live in our parents' or grandparents' time. The 100 Laws In any group of abused women there's almost always at least one who is extremely attractive; well groomed, well presented and the complete opposite of the kind of stereotypes that people normally harbour.At one domestic violence workshop, I met a stunning young woman. Intent Over the past few months, things in my life have been better than ever. New home, new friends, and wonderful career. The Real Way for Men to WOW the Woman They Love Guys, I know the struggle, you want to give her a gift that will thrill her, really show her how much you care for her. I am always trying to do this for my wife and it takes a serious game plan. Travel to Find a Russian Bride Do you agree that the best lessons are lessons given to you by other people who have already made some mistakes so that you wouldn't repeat them? We are going to have a detailed observation of a certain man's trip. When coming to Russia he managed to make a lot of mistakes and he can hardly calm down with the idea of getting wiser and more experienced. What Does Relational Success Look Like? (Characteristics Of A Growing Relationship) RELATIONAL SUCCESS.. Don't Snuff Out Expressions of Liking It is hard to express all the emotions to somebody whom you love the most. Although one wants to share all those things which he/she has in his/her heart. Gay and Lesbian Relationships America has a reluctance to accept relationships between people of the same gender. This reluctance follows a similar pattern to the hostility towards interracial relationships. Managing Miscommunication - Asking The Agreement Question? A man and woman were trying to move a couch in their home one fine morning, and were not meeting with much success. With mounting frustration in her voice, the woman said "Honey, I don't think we are ever going to get this couch out of the living room. How to Ask for a Gratifying Sex Life So your relationship has changed over the years since you said "I do" and sex isn't what it use to be. First you should know that this is normal and common place in the majority of marriages. How To (Wo)man Your Boundaries The first time I ever heard "boundaries" mentioned, it was by my then husband. He informed me that I had to protect and hold his boundaries. A Dear Jon Letter How do you let go of someone whom you have waited for all your life? How do you let go when you feel you belong with this person and you will never ever love like this again? How do you move forward when you feel like this is the one? How do you love again when you feel your soulmate was left behind? I am having a hard time letting go of someone just like that. I feel so overwhelmingly in love with him. Is Your Relationship Worth Fighting For Sometimes when a relationship has gone sour, our efforts are used trying to repair it, or "get it back", while the best thing to do might be to look at things in a different perspective. Is the relationship worth fighting for or is it truly a lost cause. Assuming Personal Responsibility in Relationships Stephen Covey in 7 Habits of Highly Effective Families says that responsibility is really the " ability to choose our response." We don't have to respond to stimuli and triggers the same way we have always done. What Is A Boundary In A Relationship? You might ask yourself, I have heard this word boundary, but I do not know what it means. Boundaries are often mentioned in terms of relationships. Secrets To Get To The Heart Of Your Loved One The other day, I was home with my sweet love when my sister called. She was in a bad mood because she was babysitting my cat (I was out of town) and my cat had made a mess in her sofa. Got a Girlfriend? Heres How Not to Screw It Up Having a girlfriend can be a dangerous thing. We become too dependent on our woman for our happiness, and then if we get dumped, we find that we've all of a sudden lost our confidence. How to Start a Conversation With a Woman Last week I had the easiest pick up and seduction of a woman in my life, and it all started with me walking by a random girl and saying (using a clear, resonating voice and disinterested, but relaxed and sexual, body language), "Hey."She looked up, expecting me to say something interesting.
|
| home | site map |
| © 2007 RichiesList.com |